I have been lucky enough to study Anatomy with world renowned anatomy expert and body worker Tom Myers. He is a legend in my field and has taught me everything I know about the amazing human body. He lives in Maine and travels the world speaking and teaching about the human body so when I heard he was coming to Virgina to give a weekend seminar all about the deep core in #yoga (pelvic floor, diaphragm and all that jazz). I cleared my schedule so I could go.
People from every category of proffession study with Tom, from doctors, to dentists, movement teachers, bodyworkers you name it. If you work with the human body in any capacity you have heard of Tom Myers' ground breaking work. Now since this weekend was all about anatomy as it relates to yoga, you can imagine the room was filled with yoga teachers from all over the country.
The weekend began with lecture on Friday night and I was beyond excited to continue to learn and dig deeper into the deep core. We began the night with a yoga practice to awaken our awareness of the regions of the body we would be learning about all weekend. After practice Tom began his lecture. As soon as her started diving in, this one woman who was front and center chimed in with a comment. It was something related to what we were studying, but I can't remember the exact content. Tom quickly got back to his lecture. As he continued on she would add her commentary, loudly saying things like "oh yeah" or "wow really" things we were all thinking in our heads, but she was vocalizing them from the front row. Every now and again she would pipe up and ask a question pulling attention back to herself.
Now you are not an anatomy nerd like me, but let me help you understand...being in a room with Tom Myers is like being in a private acoustic concert with U2. Everyone just wants Bono to look at them in the hopes they will have a moment of connection. In our anatomy nerd world he is the rockstar, the Bono of anatomy. Ok you get it.
I am not going to lie for the first hour or so I allowed it to get under my skin, distracting me from the present moment. I wanted so badly to say something or at least to say something to the moderator to request that she ask that we hold our questions till the break. About an hour in I was like "you know what Jessie, stop letting this affect you so much, you are more awakened than this...this is a chance for you to practice your #mindfulness." So I did, with each passing interruption I closed my eyes, took a few deep breaths, allowed myself to acknowledge the emotions I was feeling, to breathe with them, let them surface and watch them pass. Always returning back to peaceful and present no matter how many interruptions there were.
Saturday began, a fresh start I thought, a morning practice to awaken the pelvic floor and diaphragm, a break for breakfast and then we settled in for a long 8 hour day of lecture. I was optimistic, but OMG...he she goes again, and to my horror, the groupies have multiplied and it didn't take long for us to have 2 women in the front row constantly interjecting, adding their own commentary out loud, disrupting the flow of Tom's lecture again and again. I watched as my anger quickly resurfaced and since a pattern of stress was repeating that I had already been through, I watched the anger grow, my body temperature increase, my face get hot, I felt like I was gonna have an outburst at any moment. I needed a new strategy, and with each new (and twice as frequent now) interruption I got up a went to the bathroom. It was valuable that I realized I needed to remove myself from the stress to be sure I remained calm and peaceful. How many times would an encounter in our daily relationships go a lot more smoothly if we took a moment to excuse ourselves, so that we might come back calmer.
As you can imagine I was in the bathroom more than I was in my seat. It was on one of these many trips to the bathroom that I saw clearly. It often takes removing ourselves from the thick of the stress and pausing to receive this clarity. I realized that yes these women were effing obnoxious, but there interruptions are showing the soft vulnerable spot that all of us possess. We just want to be seen, we just want to be heard. Ultimately each human soul on this planet just want to know that we matter.
Just like that my anger dulled, my heart opened and I saw through #namaste eyes. These women just want to know that they are seen and heard. They just need to know that they matter.
My family joined me for the trip and after a long day of lecture we met up for dinner. My husband and I never go 8 hours without speaking so at dinner we started talking, reconnecting and filling each other in on our day. Quickly getting lost in our conversation, the 3rd and member of our sweet family, Addison start interrupting..."mom"..."hey mom"..."mom" I turned to her quickly in that annoyed parental way that we do and almost said "Addison I am trying to have a conversation with you father"...BUT my opened, #mindful, compassionate heart quickly stopped me. There it was again...a reminder in 8 year old form that our actions (albeit obnoxious at times) come from a good place. We all just want to be seen and heard. I calmly allowed her to interrupt and then made sure going forward it was a 3 way conversation so that I could validate to Addison's sweet little should that YES! She matters.
I learned a lot this weekend about anatomy, but more importantly about myself. I am #grateful for this reminder, I hold the lessons of this weekend close to my heart. We are all human, we are all coming from the same place and we all just want to feel that we matter.